a·gent
ˈājənt/
noun
2. a person or thing that takes an active role or produces a specified effect.
Story:
I have heard a lot of people comment about the difficulty of remembering names. Where did this idea of "being bad with names" even come from, and how has it become such a widespread deficiency?
I decided that I wanted to be good with people's names. I might have said, as much as the next person, that "I struggle with names." Why do people say this? Well, they either truly believe that they struggle to remember names, or they use it as an excuse (though probably innocently) for never remembering peoples names. (Yes, those are different).
Well I'd had enough of it! I made a plan.
Plan:
1. Try to care about what people's names are, if only for the purpose of being able to remember it.
2. When you learn a person's name, attack it with as many of your senses as you can - listen to them say it, repeat it with your own voice, picture the name in your mind, and look the person straight in the eyes for at least 0.5 seconds.
3. When you leave a conversation with a person whose name you have just learned, repeat their name to them again to verify it and remind yourself of it.
So I started using this method for memorizing people's names. Some people have... very... unique names.. and they can be harder learn.
Perhaps a couple of months after starting this, I went to a big cabin trip with my new church ward. There were about 60 people there whose names I did not know. In a single night, perhaps 3 hours, I went around and introduced myself to every one of those people and learned every one their names. I used my method. About every 10 names I would go around and make sure I could still remember all of the names I had learned. In 3 hours I had learned 60 peoples names and with literally 1 or 2 exceptions I always remembered them after that night.
Now this is just a part of me - I meet a person and learn their names once, perhaps just in quick casual conversation. But I always repeat the name. I always make sure I can spell it, and I always verify the name when the conversation ends, and 4 times out of 5 I can remember their name a month later when I randomlyl see them in the grocery store.
Why do I tell this story?
I chose to change myself. ... Isn't that AWESOME?!?!
A lot of people view our ability to choose as merely an ability to make external choices.
I believe that if a person believes that they can choose to be a certain way, they can.
They will need some resources, some tools, and some help, and in my experience many of those things are only accessible through God. It's called grace. Yet I think that WE have that most important thing - choice.
Now now, if you have some issues with this idea:
First, settle down. I know that there are, though I have no personal experience in the matter, some things that a person is simply unable to change about themselves and which is divinely appointed.
Second, I feel that we categorize far too many things as that first unchangeable kind of thing.
Third, I have said nothing here of the difficulty of making such a change. I believe that every meaningful change requires sacrifice, and that the most important changes will require the most strenuous sacrifices.
In summary, here are some examples of things that I think many people ARE able to change, but which they do NOT believe they are able to change. I will list ONLY things that I have personal experience in, but there's plenty where they came from...
1. The time of the day you sleep.
1. The time of the day you sleep.
2. How you react to stress.
3. What you think about at any given time.
4. The way you speak and the language you use even when you are totally relaxed.
5. Your desires.
6. Introverted/extroverted-ness.
I here people talk so often about these things they can't change, and I just wonder "How hard have you tried?" "How persistently have you practiced?" Sometimes, it's not that you can't change - it's that you won't. What we really need is the faith to relentlessly practice until we succeed.
